Difference Between Men & Woman (Hilarious)?

What a woman says, what she really means...


I need = I want


We need = I want


It%26#039;s your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now


Do whatever you want = You are going to pay for this later


We need to talk = I need to complain


Sure...go ahead = I don%26#039;t want you to


I%26#039;m not upset = Of course I%26#039;m upset, you moron!


You%26#039;re so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot


You%26#039;re certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?


I%26#039;m not emotional! And I%26#039;m not overreacting! = I have a severe case of PMS


Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs


This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house


I want new curtains = I want new curtains, new carpeting, new furniture, new wallpaper...


I need new shoes = the other 40 pairs are simply the wrong shade


I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep


Do you love me? = I%26#039;m going to ask for something expensive


How much do you love me? = I did something today you%26#039;re really going to hate


I%26#039;ll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V.


Is my butt fat? = Tell me I%26#039;m beautiful


You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me


Are you listening to me? = Too late, you%26#039;re dead


Yes = No


No = No


Maybe = No


I%26#039;m sorry = You%26#039;ll be sorry


I was wrong = Not as wrong as you


Do you like this recipe? = It%26#039;s easy to fix, so you%26#039;d better get used to it


Was that the baby? = Why don%26#039;t you get out of bed and walk him until he goes to sleep


I%26#039;m not yelling! = Of course I%26#039;m yelling, this is important!








What a man says, what he really means...


I%26#039;m hungry = I%26#039;m hungry


I%26#039;m tired = I%26#039;m tired


Do you want to go to a movie? = I%26#039;d eventually like to have sex with you


Can I take you out to dinner? = I%26#039;d eventually like to have sex with you


Would you like to dance? = I%26#039;d eventually like to have sex with you


Can I call you sometime? = I%26#039;d eventually like to have sex with you


Nice dress! = Nice cleavage!


You look tense, let me give you a massage = I want to fondle you


What%26#039;s wrong? = What meaningless self-inflicted psycho trauma are you going through now?


You look upset = I guess sex tonight is out of the question


Yes, I love your new hairstyle = I liked it better before


Yes, your haircut looks good = $50 and it doesn%26#039;t even look different!


I like the first dress you tried on better = Pick any freakin%26#039; dress and let%26#039;s go!

Difference Between Men %26amp; Woman (Hilarious)?
You named that joke right is was hilarious. Loved it LMAO thumbs up man
Reply:LOL, yeah I%26#039;ve got this e-mail, and I can tell you as a woman that, for me, 70% of this is right.
Reply:haha, its all true!!
Reply:so true





ha ha
Reply:All these jokes segregating men and women are getting too reetitive and annoying, say something else!!!
Reply:but they are oh-so true.
Reply:It took too long to read.



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